Interview with a Dad: 9 months edition

A little while ago I emailed Kevin to get some of his thoughts for a parenting post. His response was so great I thought I’d just put it here. I’m guessing when he got my email he made a face kind of like this:


The initial text from me is unbolded. The bold words are his responses. This is how he responds to emails with questions in them.

Hey you,

Would you be willing to answer some questions for a post on the blog?


1. What’s one thing you really want to remember about Calvin from this age? (9 months)
His honesty. I assume he’ll lie to me as he grows up, so for now I really enjoy that he tries to articulate whatever he thinks without disguising anything. 

2. Name the top three things you’re excited to do with Calvin 6 months from now.
i) Build forts of all varieties.
ii) Play in the forts we build.
iii) Destroy the forts we build.
iv) Fart in the forts we build.
v) Enjoy the summer with camp fires and trips to the pool.
vi) Sleep all the way through the night without waking up.

3. If you had to describe parenting to aliens from another world that don’t raise offspring, how would you? [note: don’t describe the act of creating a child, just the parenting part]

I would describe it to them very haphazardly. I would be too interested to hear how they came to exist without producing offspring to sustain a description of parenting. They must be immortal? Or the last remnants of a long-lived species that somehow all became sterile? In which case, why are they concerned with what it’s like for us to raise offspring? Shouldn’t they be completely consumed with trying to figure out how to perpetuate their society in the face of infertility? That’s just with respect to the fact that they don’t raise offspring. I would also want to know if their home planet can support us; though, it may not be the kind of place we’d want to escape to if it renders its inhabitants sterile. But I’d be interested to hear about how they managed to make it to us, or at least how we established communication. 

I suppose if we disregard that, I would describe it to them as a very rewarding disruption of your personal life (and space). You said one time that parenting isn’t hard, it’s just inconvenient, which I found very pithy. There are plenty of times where I feel like I don’t have the stamina to keep entertaining him, but then I suck it up and give it a try and it ends up being really fun. Like getting in really cold water, there’s an initial discomfort that gives way to a very refreshing experience that only lasts so long before you want to get out and get a warm clean towel…
That may not be the best analogy. Especially for aliens.
I would tell them it’s probably a lot like exploring space. You don’t know everything that you’re going to come across, and sometimes it feels like your light-years away from anything and totally lost and alone, but just about any direction you go looks beautiful and exciting.
That was either super deep and meaningful or super cheesy and dumb. Or both.

I think those are the random-est questions I’ve ever written! 
Random: “proceeding, made, or occurring without definite aim, reason, or pattern”. I think you’re selling yourself short. They seemed somewhat systematic, if you ask me.
Want to send me 1-3 questions back so I can answer those?

Feel free to make them random!

Okey dokey.

A) What energizes you the most about being with Calvin?

Seeing his smile. He smiles at so many things. When I’m tired of walking him around the house and letting him explore I’m often rejuvenated by an excited smile. He smiles at the oven door then looks at me and smiles then smiles back at the oven door. I never would have thought of the oven door as interesting, but it’s amazing to him.

Thinking about this more deeply I would say that I’m energized by more than just his happy personality. Regardless of his mood, I’m amazed at the little human that we made! It is pretty energizing to see a needy baby develop in a toddler that can pick things up and walk and smile.

B) What have you learned about yourself over these last 9 months that you didn’t know about yourself, or wouldn’t have guessed about yourself beforehand?

Nice question! I definitely didn’t know how little sleep I could get and still function pretty well. I would have told you before giving birth that I was so nervous about losing sleep and still being normal, but I can do it! I start feeling stretched thin if my sleep gets really interrupted (or he decides to be up for the day at 3:30am), but getting 7-8 hours of interrupted sleep is ok! And my motivation to sleep through the night is not high enough to wean him off of the 2 night feedings he’s doing. I love the solution we’ve come to right now, but I wouldn’t have guessed we’d end up co-sleeping at 9 months beforehand.

Love you,

Love you too.



I do so enjoy a silly but thoughtful email exchange with my husband. And then sharing it publicly on the blog :-).

Thanks for reading!

One thought on “Interview with a Dad: 9 months edition

  1. You two are too cute! Tell Kevin that I liked the “exploring space” analogy best. We are, indeed, on a journey and constantly exploring. The scary part is, you never get to go back, but always further and deeper in. Even if you have another baby, it’s unknown territory, and you’re always going on with baby #1 at the same time as you are getting acquainted with baby #2….and no two babies are exactly alike.

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